Topher Florence

1. Archie Meets The Punisher

Conceived as a joke, but amazingly brought to fruition, AMTP is a Marvel Comics crossover that is essentially a big love letter to Archie and the Riverdale gang. The Punisher has to hunt down an devistatingly ugly and possibly brain damaged redheaded criminal, but our pal Archie ends up in the crosshairs instead. The comics is also great because instead of coming to any middle ground of styles, the characters wildly clash all over the page. Way better written than it has any right to be, this was self aware, funny, and clever stuff.

2. Archie Meets God

I read a lot of Christian Archies at Bible Camp and always wondered why in the world they chose such a two-timing loser to represent our Lord and Savior. Licensed to the Christian comic company Spire, these Comics are completly worth reading for how completly bizzare they are. The are filled with great anti-liberal propaganda and delighfully off model drawings. You haven’t lived until you’ve seen Betty Cooper yell about how going steady with Jesus is better than any date.

3. Archie Meets Grunge

Part of a special Gen13 issue, Grunge travels through the dreamlike Land of Sequential Art, crossing over into various comics, including Archie. A fun read, and neat if only to see how much more appealing the Archie Comics house style is than Image was.

4. Archie Meets Betty and Veronica’s Dynamic New Look

A four issue mini story that’s currently ongoing as of this writing, it’s drawn in an interesting new style, but such a bland yawnfest. I like this comic, though, because it makes people who don’t buy or read Archie comics complain about a change that doesn’t even affect any other stories.

I love making steroid-addled semi-recognizable virtual cosplayers with this thing.

This is a clip from the short-lived sitcom My Living Doll in which psychologist Robert McDonald (Robert Cummings) is the carketaker for a female android named Rhoda (Julie Newmar). In this scene Robert has to find a way to get Rhoda out of a marriage prpposal she accidentally agreed to. This is really one of the weirdest sitcoms ever put on film. This clip is also a great example of Julie Newmar’s comic range

Jonny Quest’s bodyguard and tutor Roger “Race” Bannon is a pretty intense guy. If you are a threat to Jonny or the Quest family, Race will probably take you out. Here are some of his greatest hits.

Generation X was a TV Movie produced in 1996, based on the comic of the same name. It was also a possible pilot for a syndicated TV show. These are some theoretical credits from if it had succeded. The music is The Theme to Jets N’ Guns by Machinae Supremacy.

Amorena Mendez grew up on a ranch just outside of Dubois, Wyoming. From a young age, she was charmingly sociable and a natural performer. Her talents were carefully cultivated by her loving parents and a team of specialists from the around the globe. Mendez was one of the first hybrid models from the Apple/Disney Ranch.

Amorena is comprised of two major DNA subsets: those of Morena Baccarin and Amerie Rogers, both obtained during the post-Crash buyout of celebrity genomes.

The actress and singer were found to be highly complimentary through extensive market research and computer analysis. From Rogers, Amorena gets her exotic beauty and affinity for music. From Baccarin, she gets her classical good looks and grace.

Amorena’s genome contains fifty percent from both her biological mothers, as exemplified below

A former Miss Teen USA and a top 90th percentile graduate of the Olsen Institute, Amorena is fluent in English, Spanish, Mandarin, and Arabic. She is a government certified Role Model and is one of the highest ranking North American First Crushes according to the Myspace Research Group.

Now emancipated from her guardianship, Amorena has founded the AM Company, dedicated to producing quality entertainment franchises and upholding high standards of corporate ethics.

Amorena Mendez resides in Uncanny Valley, California and can currently be seen in Nintendo’s Obsidian Coast series and as a hostess on the Disney Channel Classics Webcast.